Sunday, April 12, 2009


The wealth of happiness card in my Tarot deck is the ten of cups. The picture shows ten goblets overflowing with a sparkling, bubbling liquid. Last time I threw the cards I got the nine and the ten of cups and I knew that this was it, that my life had finally reached some pinnacle of joy that I had been seeking all my life.

It seems a bit strange because in so many ways I have failed to accomplish or acquire the things that I once thought would make me happy. I am alone a lot, but it has brought me more stable emotions, and a clearer sense of my own voice.

I live in a beautiful place. This morning I carried my tea out to the meadow where my two beagles like to race around sniffing out rabbits. The sky was the most heavenly shade of blue. The grey woods now have a haze of green leaves budding, and splashes of white dogwood and pink redbud.

The grass in the meadow is old and yellow from last year, but everywhere the new grass is shooting up and creating an undercarpet of green.

I sat out on my favorite log and drank my tea. There is a huge contentment in my soul, and all I could think of to say to God was "Thank you!" I marvel at how my life brings me what I need each day. The more I trust it, the easier it gets just to stay open to receive what comes, and also to stay open to lose what goes.

My whole life seems like such a miracle to me, the incredible beauty of this North Carolina spring, my own ability to heal and grow, my family and my dogs and cats, my work, my clients and my friends. Having work I love is a great blessing. I marvel at the crooked path that brought me to this place and time.