Sunday, September 19, 2004


I want to write something today for my new blog. It is a glorious day today after the rains and winds from the hurricane have blown through town leaving the sky an intense bright blue and all the leaves shiny and clean.

Last night they talked about how “Nothing should disturb your peace.” A huge disturbance in a close relationship finds me scrambling to get my inner peace back together again. The hurricane has blown right through my heart. I am left picking up the pieces and looking for some new way to be. I have lost track of my center. I have given away my power again. Loved too much, or perhaps just not wisely enough.

What is my peace?
Something I need to nourish. It is that calm and centered feeling when I am most like a pool of deep cool water. When I am angry, upset and jealous it all disappears, gets fragmented, clouded.

Dances of Universal Peace - the Dancing really helps. Touching hearts and hands with others, twirling, floating on the beautiful rhythms and inspiring words. It brings me back to myself, and leaves me at peace with my fellow dancers. With them at least I feel calm and alive after the dancing.

Everything we desire from life is light (energy).
I definitely want energy from others, but I want it in certain ways and only from certain people. Perhaps I am not synthesizing enough energy on my own. I want too much from one other person when I am capable of soaking up that energy directly from God on my own.

Of course I don’t remember that when I am all caught up in the drama of unrequited love. That delusion leads me to believe that what I want must come from the object of my desire. But when that person goes away and I am left so terribly alone, then I start to synthesize it for myself.

Things that make me peaceful are:
Walking in nature
Singing peaceful songs
Dancing peaceful dances
Speaking kindly with others
Being by large bodies of water, the ocean, lakes and ponds
Writing and thinking things through

What makes you peaceful?

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